beckstraordinary
one classy broad
9.02.2006
And She Was Malcontent...
I was going to wear a dress tonight. I'd worn it before. I put it on and blessings upon curses, it didn't fit. This is good because it means I am somehow smaller than the last time I put it on. However, this is bad because it means I was only able to wear it once. Like I said: blessings upon curses.

I know it's been a while since I've really written anything. I'd apologize, but I'm at quite the place right now. I feel like I'm really disheartening everyone and that is the last thing I hope for anyone. Right now I'm not really being too patient and am getting quick to anger. I've been more pissy than Trevor lately...I think I'm just pretty good at hiding that stuff. I will say that everything is annoying me lately.

Topic swirling in my head these days: Shitheads. Shitheads who are elitest. Shitheads who follow the fold because their friends are elitest. Shitheads who make me feel like shit when they drag me along in their quest for shithead elitism and I'm the all-inclusive type making it look like I'm a shithead right along with them. Damn shitheads.

Now, I apologize to all the young and innocent eyes that have just been privy to the topic swirling in my head these days. I've just found myself around a crowd of people who complain endlessly about each other and then won't play nice with anyone else. All they do is bitch and moan about everybody and don't dare believe they have anything to do with it, and thus drag everyone down to their level.

I won't lie. It felt nice to be sucked in, in the beginning, because who wants to feel left out? But the deeper I fall into this steaming pile of shitheads, the more I'm disgusted and dissapointed that it's what they've all turned out to be. It's what I've started falling into and what I hope I can rise above.

I do not believe I am in any way better than the shitheads...they have their reasons I'm sure. I'm just trying to find a balance to all this nonsense because it's turning me and a few other formerly decent people right into shitheads along with the putrid pile.

Do you ever think you're posting something dangerous? Well, eff it all if you do. People have their grudges and they can. When it's begining to poison something you love, why leave it at the level you're at when you know you can do things to bring the level up?
5 Comments:
Blogger onionboy said...
yes, it is always dangerous to call elitist pigs on their elitism. viva la revolution!

Blogger Viv said...
Well said. Yes, I do feel like I'm posting something dangerous but sometimes things just need to be said. I don't like to hear people complain about other people myself. It's very draining. I tend to just withdraw, which isn't right. I admire your spirit.

Blogger cliffo said...
Quite pulling your punches and say what you really feel!

Blogger SuzieQ said...
I think this has to do with what you were talking about last night. I'm sorry...I know you won't get pulled in. It's not possible to get pulled into something you're not destined to. It wasn't possible for me to get pulled into a slutty stoner, because obviously that's just not who I really am. I know you're nothing like "the shitheads." If you ever come close to become one, I'll be sure to straighten you out. hehehe Hope things get better,though :)

Blogger Linda said...
cliff, I am beginning to think that you are a trouble maker! *grin*

if it feels right, say it! get rid of the negative energy that is bogging you down. kick it to the curb! then, you can go dancing at LITP and have a great time!

give a smile and a wink to the next person you meet...it is contagious.

I wish I could give you some of my energy and happiness. I am babbling...hyper right at the moment. I am here if you want to talk....Linda